Real Love and Why Some Characters Simply Can’t Do It.

Some people can’t love. Let me explain. To be able to love, you first have to know what love is. And as I’ve written before, understanding the true nature of love is difficult in our times. For one thing, our culture has us believing that a lot of things are love that really aren’t. Genuine love also has many “close cousins” as well as “imposters.” Any one of these can be easily mistaken for the real thing.

The other major reason some people can’t love is that they don’t have the character “equipment” for it. That is, they haven’t developed the qualities of character that make it possible for them to really love. They might know how to charm, seduce, affirm, show interst and/or affection, be engaging, etc. But those things don’t necessarily mean that they’re capable of really loving.

Love is a Verb

Loving is a unique kind of doing. It’s not a sentiment, but an act of will. It’s the genuine willing of well for another (including oneself). By nature, that kind of behavior is self-giving and self-emptying, as opposed to self-serving. And takes sacrifice, perhaps more importantly, the willingness to sacrifice.

Many of the sentiments and behaviors that mimic love can be powerfully attractive. That’s why and how so many folks get lured into relationships that eventually become toxic. Genuine lovers do not produce poison. And genuinely loving relationships bear enduring, sweet fruits.

Character Matters Goes Live 4-2-25

Character Matters will air live on my YouTube Channel 4-2-25. Use THIS LINK to access the program directly. And use this LIVE STUDIO ENTRY LINK to enter the broadcast studio and converse live.  The program airs at NOON CENTRAL DAYLIGHT TIME (10 am Pacific, 11 am Mountain, and 1 pm Eastern).

We’ll be discussing the nature of real love. We’ll also be discussing why some people can’t love (i.e. most narcissists and other disturbed characters).

You can read a lot more about genuine love and the capacity for it in Essentials for the Journey.