The human heart is a precious commodity, and the tenderest hearts are the most easily broken. Folks used to spend a lot of time vetting a potential intimate relationship partner’s character, but sadly, character vetting has become a lost art.
Do we all need therapy? Perhaps not. Could most of us benefit from a little therapy? Probably, especially if it’s the right kind.
Abuse victims and toxic relationship survivors are used to doing all the suffering while their tormentors seem to get off scott free. But with time and dedicated rehearsing, survivors can cultivate empowering habits. And when they remember the all-important task of self-reinforcing their efforts, the quest for empowered living gets a bit easier.
Folks in relationships with disturbed characters worry about their future. And they lament many things in the past. But personal empowerment lies in making choices and taking action in the present moment.
Sound character requires that we outgrow our innate egocentricity. And it’s more than an emotional or psychological exercise. It’s a profound spiritual undertaking.
Recovering from gaslighting effects and regaining one’s sanity after an abusive relationship isn’t easy. Victims frequently mistrust themselves and worry about making the same relationship mistakes again. And getting the wrong kind of help can easily re-traumatize. Empowerment begins with understanding what really happened and why.
The interrelationship between substance use and character is often complex and poses many challenges for providing the right kind of help.
Depending upon what traits and tendencies tend to be more prevalent in their overall makeup, living with a borderline personality can present some very unique challenges.
There’s a dynamic interaction between the borderline individual’s innate predispositions and the traumatic early history they have typically experienced. It’s hard enough for a person who tends to react strongly and erratically, tends to think dialectically, and is prone to mentally splitting unitary realities into polar opposites to get a solid sense of what the world is like and how to deal with it. But when you put such an individual into an environment where there is actually is no safety or consistency, you have a recipe for genuine disaster when it comes to personality formation and solidification.
Whether you’re seeking help for yourself as the victim or survivor of an abusive relationship, or trying to get some assistance in dealing with a character-impaired individual, getting the right kind of help can be a real challenge.