The tactic of denial can be expressed in several other subtle variations such as feigning innocence, feigning ignorance, and acting surprised. But no matter what form in which it comes, it’s most often merely a way of lying.
There are many reasons possessiveness, not all of which are rooted in insecurity and low self-esteem.
Disturbed characters tend to crave stimulation and excitement and have an inordinate distaste for anything they might regard as “boring,” tedious, or mundane.
Recently, a woman in Sweden wrote to inform me that she has had In Sheep’s Clothing featured on her site for several years because she believes it “to be of immense help to everyone who has ever had to deal with manipulative individuals.”
Disordered characters use the tactic of minimizing to manage the impression others have of them. It’s a way to manipulate others into thinking they’re not so bad despite the horrible things they’ve done.
“Denial” has traditionally been conceptualized as an ego defense mechanism. But disordered characters use denial as a tactic to feign innocence, and to manipulate and manage the impression of others who might otherwise have their number.
Like most disturbed characters, manipulators are skilled liars. Most people, however can’t understand why such people lie so much, especially when it seems to serve no purpose.
The “problems” neurotics experience often stem from emotional conflicts that rage deep within their unconscious minds. They’re typically unaware of what’s at the root of the “symptoms” they report. If a woman already knew that the unexplained funk she’d been in lately was related to her suppressed feelings of grief and loss that just happened to be … Continue reading Neurotic or Character Disorder? Criterion 5 Awareness
Disordered characters don’t feel shame like neurotics do. Although pop psychology has given shame a bad name, the ability to feel it is a mark of good character. I wrote recently about how neurotic individuals and disturbed characters differ greatly on the issue of guilt. Guilt and shame are related. Guilt is the bad feeling we get … Continue reading Neurotic or Character Disorder? Criterion 4 – Shame
People often get manipulated because they misjudge the character of their manipulator. We have a tendency to want to see everyone else as basically pretty much like us. We want to think that they think the same way, care about the same things, and feel the same way we do. But individuals with disturbed characters … Continue reading Neurotic vs. Character Disorder? Criterion Three – Guilt