Manipulative people are among the most skilled liars. As masters of deception, they know each and every little way to lie. Perhaps the biggest single reason their tactics of manipulation and control work is because their surface-level behaviors can easily have you believing one thing while underneath the surface something else is really going on.
Trust is not just a prerequisite for a sound therapeutic relationship. It’s an essential ingredient – perhaps the single most important ingredient – in any relationship, especially our more intimate relationships.
Psychology needs to set aside our outdated, well-intended but purely speculative and unverifiable notions about who we are and why we do the things we do and build on the hard science we’ve acquired about our species and the natural world around us.
Once you’re intimately familiar with all the tactics they habitually employ to: 1) get the better of you; and 2) look good while doing it, you can be more sure of your judgments about your manipulator’s character.
After years of being manipulated, abused, and controlled, survivors of dysfunctional relationships can experience a variety of emotions that make it difficult to move on, even after mustering the courage to leave. Self-questioning, doubt and blame can pose real obstacles on the road to recovery. Life after a manipulator can be a welcome joy indeed, but it’s not always so easy to get there.