Manipulation of the Heart
Some character disturbed folks are skilled in manipulation of the heart. How pathological such manipulators are varies. So, the damage they can do varies. For example, there are amorous narcissists who are only mildly to moderately disordered. These folks seem like lovers. And they make you think they’re all about you. They charm convincingly. And they’ll worm their way into your heart, one way or another. But like all narcissistic folks, it’s always really about them. Their principal aim is not so much to love you but to get you to be enamored of them.
Folks skilled in manipulation of the heart know what to look for in others. Everyone has unmet wants and needs. And some folks are particularly astute at discerning those needs. So, they’ll say just the right things and do all the right things to win you over. But you generally won’t know how capable of genuine love they are until long after you give your heart away.
Maybe you grew up facing nothing but disapproval. A heart thief who senses that might well find affirmation as the surest way to your heart. Maybe you were the person in your family who chronically went unnoticed. That leaves you open to manipulation of the heart even when the person paying you so much attention isn’t doing so with ulterior motives.
The Power of Self-Awarness and Character
It always pays to know exactly where you are on your unique path toward character integrity. And that’s just one reason I wrote Essentials for the Journey. We live in times where all too many among us are severely arrested in their character development. But the stronger you are in a positive sense of self, and the more honest you are with yourself about the degree of character you’ve developed within yourself, the less likely you are to be duped. That’s not to say that there aren’t amazingly skilled con artists out there capable of fooling anyone. Still, character is, as always, your very best insurance.
This week’s Character Matters podcast is a recorded program, available on my YouTube Channel. I continue the discussion on commonly misused and misunderstood psychological terms, including covert-aggression.
Stay tuned for information on other platforms that will feature my podcasts in the near future.