Even when it’s subtle, a narcissist’s rage is a way of saying: “How dare you even think of dethroning me!! Just who do you think you are?”
Our high capacity to learn distinguishes us humans. And even some character-impaired individuals can choose to grow. But no new learning takes deep root without reinforcement.
The thoughts running through our head are either secure or insecure, positive or negative. But in any given moment, we have the power to change them.
Affirm yourself when you recognizing when you recognize old habits or self-defeating cycles. And affirm yourself again for every step in new, positive directions. You’ll be well on your way to more empowered living.
The secret to empowerment is simple, although not easy. But with time, practice, and especially, reinforcement, it becomes easier.
Abuse victims and toxic relationship survivors are used to doing all the suffering while their tormentors seem to get off scott free. But with time and dedicated rehearsing, survivors can cultivate empowering habits. And when they remember the all-important task of self-reinforcing their efforts, the quest for empowered living gets a bit easier.
Folks in relationships with disturbed characters worry about their future. And they lament many things in the past. But personal empowerment lies in making choices and taking action in the present moment.
Self-blame in the aftermath of a toxic relationship is common. Victims blame themselves for not realizing things sooner and for tolerating things too long.
Under the gaslight, you stop trusting your gut. But once the mask comes off your manipulator you realize your gut was right all along and you’re free to start trusting yourself and your instincts once again.
I was recently interviewed by Anne Nelson of Fully Thriving for the upcoming Marriage Mastery Summit. My segment goes live on the site March 19, 2020.