It Takes a Village – But What Kind?

It Takes A Village

Many are familiar with the adage “it takes a village to raise a child.” But when a politician made a point of this a while back, an outcry ensued. Why? Most likely not so much because folks disagree that the environment we live in affects how our children develop. Rather, it’s because many of us worry about just what kind of community surrounds us and how its dominant values are likely to impact our chidren’s character formation.

Many parents feel more than merely alone in their efforts to instill proper values in their children. Some parents worry so much about the environments their children live in that they do their best to isolate them. But even so, they often feel undermined in their efforts by a culture and community that egregiously endorses and promotes poor character health. For a child – or even an adult – to grow positively in character, it indeed takes a village. But the kind of village matters. A community or culture that promotes attitudes of entitlement, excessive self-focus, instant gratification, poor self-regulation, etc. will only help produce individuals impaired in their capacity to relate to others in wholesome, productive ways. That’s what character disturbance is all about.

It Takes More than Good Intentions

Merely wanting the best for our children is not enough. You have to understand what’s truly in their best interest. That’s where certain principles of attitude and conduct that have proven themselves throughout the centuries come in. But while the values themselves offer incredible potential, how readily folks embrace them is heavily influenced by the milieu of the times. And in our times, folks often find little reason to embrace the arduous task for forging solid character. Getting the things we want and think we need, often in the wrong ways, is simply too easy. And discerning what we actually need to be fulfilled, and finding the will to pay the price necessary to secure it, has become more challenging than ever.

The reality I allude to above is responsible for more unnecessary pain and hardship than I care to think about. Over my many years in clinical counseling, my sadest moments involved witnessing a young person decide it simply “wasn’t worth it” to bear the pain associated with some of the harder but most valuable lessons life was trying to teach them. They hadn’t the emotional maturity and strength to weather the storm. A tragedy all around. (See, also, please:  Character Is Like a Psychological Immune System.) And that’s just another reason why I advocate about character so much. I discuss these matters on the latest Character Matters podcast, also.

4 thoughts on “It Takes a Village – But What Kind?

  1. To anyone I found this on YouTube.

    200 Years Before “Mayberry” – The Self Sufficient Small Town Of Early America

    Townsends

    1. I am a fan of Townsends. He cooks PUDDINGS. Made with Suet.
      The grandmother was a good cook.
      I Still love Steak and Kidney Pudding. Cook in a Cloth.

      I have Her old or should I say, Very Old Cook Book. Printed in 1908

      1. Hi Joey,
        I read your poem for me and it was lovely and graciously accepted. I wish I had all the poems you posted for me. Thank you dear one.

        I would love to hear more about the cookbook.
        I will be posting more in the coming months.

        Hugs and Gods Blessings to you
        BTOV

        1. It Takes a Village to raise our children.

          That is true, we need our schools, teachers, friends, neighbors as allies who have moral integrity to look our for our children as we would look out for their children.

          Unfortunately, this world has changed for the worst in the last 50 years. We no longer have the community or moral integrity and pride that made this country great. When a nation becomes Godless and adapts all sorts of immorality it set the stage for decline.

          In my life I try to surround myself with people that have integrity and a sound moral compass. As we look out for our children we also have to look out for ourselves and set the example of what Character and moral integrity is. We must take back our communities and speak out about what is correct and wrong with love and kindness but at the same time take a stance without fear to speak truth about moral integrity which this nation has seemed to have lost.

          We must not fear to speak the truth of what we have lost, we must speak out what a true Village of what moral values, integrity and character is. Dr. Simon’s blog is a fine example of taking back our communities in a loving, truthful way, building a foundation of what real character is and not what the world dictates.

          The power lies in each of us to bring back a caring. loving community but at the heart of all of this is: I believe where we are as a hedonistic society we need desperately to bring back a God fearing Nation based on morality and love.

          Gods (our Creator) Blessings, to All
          BTOV

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