A Defining Characteristic

Narcissists are known for their habitual exaggeration and hyperbole. Why do they do it? For multiple reasons, all self-serving. But the main two reasons are self-aggrandizement and manipulation through impression management.

Exaggeration and hyperbole are ways the narcissist affirms their grandiose self-image. In some cases it can be a way builds him/herself up. But in most cases, it’s just posturing. Feeling superior and always right, it’s also the way they make others out to be the stupid, inferior, crazy one when they call them out. It’s actually quite a powerful way to manipulate and control others

A Major Misconception

Traditional psychology theories taught that all  narcissists exaggerate to compensate for underlying, unconscious fears and insecurity. And while this can sometimes be true for some types of narcissists, it’s rarely the case for most. More often, any shaky sense of self (and reality!) the narcissistic character has (and reality!) results from their habitual exaggeration of their their abilities, their worth, and their understanding of things.

Where the Danger Lies

Grandiose narcissists are particularly prone to exaggeration and hyperbole. And they’re dangerous in all types of situations, especially intimate relationships and most especially in positions of power and authority. As I’ve written about extensively, (See: Chapter 3 in both In Sheep’s Clothing and Character Disturbance), only 3 things matter to them, position, position, and position. The less aggressive types, already believing themselves superior, simply relish lording power over others. (See also: Rabid Dominance Seekers.) The more aggressive types, lusting in the weilding of power, ruthlessly abuse any power afforded them. It’s really impossible to underestimate the danger involved in affording a grandiose type any measure of power. (See also:  Character and the Abuse of Power.)

An Adaptive Strategy

Sadly, narcissistic styles of all types are not only adaptive but tend to flourish in certain cultural climates. As I’ve mentioned before, there’s a strong interrelationship between character and culture. (See: Culture Influences Character and Vice-Versa.) And that’s one major reason why in our present climate narcissism of all types has become so rampant. Milder forms are barely noticed because they’re so commonplace and actually quite adaptive. But severe forms are also more prevalent, too. And they’re encouraged, and even rewarded by many factors. There’s always a price to pay for this, and things will have to self-correct at some point. But as I first pointed out over 30 years ago, that realization generally comes after it’s either almost too late or actually too late.

Concluding Remarks

While a narcissist’s tendency toward exaggeration and hyperbole is a common feature, it’s the other aspects of their character that make them so unhealthy.  I’ll be addressing those aspects in some upcoming articles.