When vetting the character of a potential partner, make sure to scrutinize carefully their attitudes toward work and their work history. That will tell you a lot about where they are on the road to “love ability.”
Perhaps the most common brainwashing technique is indoctrination through constant repetition of a limited set of ideas while simultaneously discouraging or disparaging alternative thinking.
Charm and charisma are powerful personal attributes. By themselves, they are neither positive or negative qualities. Character makes all the difference. Decent folks with charm and charisma can move mountains and do a lot of good, whereas charming, charismatic narcissists inevitably cause harm.
We need our egos to navigate an often hostile, unloving world. And we need ego to mediate our baser instincts, too. But an ego too full of itself is always a problem, a destroyer of relationships, and often, of societies, too.