Character-impaired folks inevitably use and abuse others. And the more they lack conscience and empathy, the more seriously they’re likely to use and abuse.
Shame can be certainly be a bad thing. And some shame is truly toxic. But in our days of rampant character dysfunction, shamelessness is a much bigger problem than too much shame. The most disturbed characters among us are the most shameless.
To become empowered partners in abusive relationships have to see through their manipulator’s tactics, knowing in their heart how to distinguish a victim from a victimizer.
Personal integrity reaches its height in the absence of pretense. The truly decent character has searched his/her heart, knows it well, and strives to keep it pure. This takes a great deal of persistent mindfulness.
Sincerity of heart and purpose means harboring no hidden agendas. Sincere folks don’t try to get things in a slimy, underhanded, or undeserving way. They’re as true to themselves as they are authentic to others.
Abusive relationship partners are often relentless. They hate to miss an opportunity to denigrate and dominate. And over time, their victims can begin to see themselves in the same negative way their abusers cast them.
Disturbed characters know how to spot the conscientious. And they’re eager to exploit and abuse them. Sadly, sometimes overly conscientious folks delude themselves. They think they can “fix” the morally broken among us – those with impaired or absent consciences.