Fighting dirty is fighting without principle-guided limits and boundaries. It’s placing winning over everything and using whatever tactics or psychological “weapons” you can think of to secure the dominant position. Such fighting is the destroyer of relationships.
Some things are well worth fighting for. But there’s a way to go about this enterprise that builds as opposed to destroys.
Assertiveness is fair, principled, disciplined, fighting. And it’s the kind of just self-advocacy coupled with mindful concern for the impact on others that defines healthy character.
Willfulness has a positive and negative side. A strong will can be one’s foremost asset. But it can also be a great liability. A properly formed and guided will is essential for sound character.
Disturbed characters know how to spot the conscientious. And they’re eager to exploit and abuse them. Sadly, sometimes overly conscientious folks delude themselves. They think they can “fix” the morally broken among us – those with impaired or absent consciences.
Right thinking is thinking guided by principle. And not just any principle but the overriding principle of love.
A life governed by the pursuit of comfort and security breeds a type of spiritual emptiness. But a more vast and wondrous existence awaits those who allow faith and not fear to rule.
Mindfulness is the key to true self-mastery. It’s too easy to live life on autopilot, a slave to our appetites and aversions. Connecting to the source brings us inner healing and also helps us relate to others in helpful, healing ways.
Facing and embracing the truth about ourselves is hard. But when we do, we can become incredibly empowered. The truth truly does have power to set us free. And it can wrest us from the shackles hindering our spiritual and character growth.
Unconscious denial is nature’s defense against unbearable pain. But some denial is tactical – a way to be irresponsible while not looking so bad. To have reverence for the truth and for human dignity, each type must be confronted differently.