Toxic relationships are born of narcissistic irreverence. One simply can’t love what what can’t first appreciate.
Environments can be structured in a way that promote – even reward narcissistic behavior. Narcissism was once regarded as both an aberration and a significant disturbance or disorder of character. But a culture of entitlement, permissiveness, and relativism has helped make it more the norm. And sadly, in far too many aspects of modern life, narcissism has actually become quite adaptive.
Like it or not, we sometimes have to deal with vulgar narcissists. And because they don’t care, we might wonder what good it does to confront them. The answer here lies in the good that can come from outing the truth.
Narcissists get “stuck” at the egocentric stage of emotional, psychological, and spiritual development. And their self-absorption keeps them from paying attention to and learning from what only caring, intimate relations with others can teach them.
Narcissistic Manipulation – Who’s Vulnerable? Anyone can succumb to a narcissist’s charm. Some narcissists possess great impression-management skill. But some personality types are particularly vulnerable to narcissistic manipulation. And research has confirmed that two personality traits make all the difference. All my books address the issue of vulnerability to narcissistic manipulation. And my book In … Continue reading Personalities Prone to Narcissistic Manipulation
Thanksgiving means more than a single holiday. Responsible people render it daily in their undertakings. But in this age of rampant narcissism and entitlement, cultivating gratitude is difficult. So, far too few give thanks with their actions. Rather, they take, use, exploit, and injure – all for their own gratification. And they do such things without compunction because they feel entitled.
I have much for which to be grateful. Your validation and promotion of my work has always inspired and sustained me. It’s impossible to say how much such support means to me. So, from the bottom of my heart, “Thank you!”
Years of research solidly point to one crucial factor when it comes to character health: the ability to delay gratification. Such an ability must be carefully cultivated. But in an indulgent world, just learning when and how to say “no” to oneself is difficult. And actually imposing a “no” is even more so.
Relationships with heartless characters follow a typical course. You get seduced by the tremendous interest someone shows in you. And most importantly, you mistake the interest for caring. Only later do you realize how utterly expendable you are, especially once you’ve outlived your usefulness.
Brash and vulgar narcissists naturally offend us. So, we naturally want to keep our distance and watch our backs. But charming narcissists are in some ways more dangerous. Like I say in In Sheep’s Clothing, dealing with them can be like getting whiplash. You only fully realize who they are and what they’ve done to you after the fact.
Malignant narcissists disdain all the qualities most of us think make us decent human beings. They see them as signs of weakness. And they see them as proof of others’ inferiority. That’s what enables them to feel superior. And that’s why they feel entitled to prey.