Category Archives: Aggression

How to Spot Covert Narcissists

At the outset of a relationship, covert narcissists can seem quite harmless. And they can be quite charming, too. Their narcissistic behaviors present in subtle, hard to detect ways. That’s why it’s so important to know the signs of covert narcissism.

Verbal Abuse Leaves Deep Scars

Abusive relationship partners are often relentless. They hate to miss an opportunity to denigrate and dominate. And over time, their victims can begin to see themselves in the same negative way their abusers cast them.

Fair Fighting Can Build Relationships

Fair fighting is fighting with principle. It’s strong advocacy tempered with care and concern. When we fight fairly, with principle, and with care not to needlessly injure, we build instead of destroy.

Fighting Dirty Destroys Relationships

Fighting dirty is fighting without principle-guided limits and boundaries. It’s placing winning over everything and using whatever tactics or psychological “weapons” you can think of to secure the dominant position. Such fighting is the destroyer of relationships.

Constructive Versus Destructive Relationships

Some things are well worth fighting for. But there’s a way to go about this enterprise that builds as opposed to destroys.

Principled Fighting Defines Assertiveness

Assertiveness is fair, principled, disciplined, fighting. And it’s the kind of just self-advocacy coupled with mindful concern for the impact on others that defines healthy character.

Conscience and Conscientiousness

Disturbed characters know how to spot the conscientious. And they’re eager to exploit and abuse them. Sadly, sometimes overly conscientious folks delude themselves. They think they can “fix” the morally broken among us – those with impaired or absent consciences.

Learning the Secret to Impulse Control

Many folks get goaded into therapy simply because they haven’t learned to control themselves. And, sadly, the helping professions aren’t generally good at providing these individuals the right kind of interventions.